This bit was included in an entry containing links to a lot of locations. Feel free to read the entry. My real reason for directing you back there is Arts Anonymous’ 12 Step Program which starts with: “We admitted we were powerless over our creativity — that our lives had become unmanageable. ”
Check out the 12 Traits they list that drive you to this situation. Good chance all or most are true for you.
"Though while the author wishes they could buy it in Walmart..." Who is "they"? The kids? The author? Something else?…