Those of you who do not know the genius producer Brian Eno well………. where have you been? A short list of those he has worked with: Peter Gabriel, Devo, Laurie Anderson, Talking Heads, David Byrne, Roxy Music, Depeche Mode, U2……. you get the picture. He is also a regular answer in Will Shortz’s New York Times Crossword puzzles. But he came into my mind for another reason lately: strolling through an airport.
Can I admit something here? I hate Christmas, mainly for two reasons: 1) the incessant appeal to your capitalist instinct to BUY BUY BUY BUY BUY!!!!!; and 2) the damn music. I’m just so sick of Christmas music that every year at this time I threaten to move to a predominantly Muslim country. Of course that has its own set of issues. It was reason #2 that struck me when I was going through the Minneapolis airport the other day. It’s funny, MSP airport has a 9′ Yamaha (I’ll save the “I hate Yamahas” rant for a later time) right smack dab in the middle of the main terminal. It’s almost never used except when there is some poor pianist making a quick buck playing really bad renditions of standards and daydreaming about Scriabin. Just to enliven their day I always ask if they know the “Black Mass” sonata.
In 1978 Eno put out an album called Music for Airports. In college my buddies and I would sit around and…….. uhh ………… well…………. “listen” to this album. (note to self – check on the Statute of Limitations for the State of New York) It’s a fascinating album of ambient music made by a master of the field. The first installation was at LaGuardia in the Marine Air Terminal. It would definitely be a better bet than the ubiquitous bad piano playing at MSP.
But here’s another idea: goodness, folks, why don’t we put chamber music back in front of a captive audience? Let’s get quartets and trios into the airports, make it a festive occasion for folks who are stuck dealing with the Department of Hard-Assed Stupidity (Homeland Security for those of you who don’t have the joy of traveling routinely). Of course there are some obvious problems with this idea:
1) The Joshua Bell effect – Josh has set the bar high when it comes to busking for cash.
2) Can you imagine trying to convince DHS that a passel of musicians coming through their airport is actually benign? I bet those folks have seen too many ’30’s gangster movies.
3) No Boulez. Hanging around airports is enough of a headache.
4) It’s probably too expensive – though I bet every airport wastes enough money to hire an entire orchestra on a daily basis.
Any way, it’s a thought. Put some nice music into the terminal, employ some musicians, everybody comes out ahead.
“The white zone is for loading and unloading of instruments only………”